My latest thoughts on anxiety in its purist form is that it is a lack of trust...
TRUST IN YOURSELF
TRUST YOU'LL BE OFFERED OR GIVEN WHAT YOU NEED
TRUST IN THE UNIVERSE
If you are a religious person, this would be equivalent to faith.
If you get pulled into the busy mind and the anxiety that plagues you is the flavor of "what ifs?" or maybe your anxiety takes the form of "what if I make the wrong decision?", Finally there is another form that is "what if someone thinks I'm _______."
Trusting yourself. Can you start to ask yourself these questions, can you trust yourself? Have you shown up in the past for yourself?
Exercise 1: When you're in a good head space, start to make a list of all the times you showed up for yourself? The time your sister called you in need of help and you went, the time you committed to that work out class at 6A and you went, the time you applied for that job that was a bit out of reach. Just list them down the page.These are all times you showed up for yourself. When you are in anxiety mind, you cannot always think rationally and you may only see the times you did not follow through.Your global statement is "I never do anything right". That is just not true. Now keep that list at hand, read it often, add to it and start to trust yourself, you can rely on yourself to show up BIG.
Trusting you'll be offered what you need. For some of us we have been offered what we need in the past and therefore seeing that in the future, going forward is a lot easier. What if you haven't? What if your parents weren't there for you? What if you had no fallback plan financially? Some people are truly on their own. That is stressful. So taking the tack- have I landed on my feet, in the end? It may have been challenging and filled with different kinds of loss, but yes, I am still standing- and there was certainly learning from that. If you have been through A LOT, then you are a survivor, you continue to come back, slog through and try again.
Exercise 2: The reality is that yesterday is gone. Let me repeat, everything that happened yesterday no longer exists. Only our thoughts, interpretations and the meanings we put on yesterday remain. There is a way that yesterday has no bearing on what happens today. Remind yourself, just because it has been hard in the past and you haven't been given what you need, that does not mean that will be the case moving forward. There are always opportunities moving forward. Practice being open to possibilities. Keep your eyes up and open and you will notice them.
Trust in the Universe. When we choose one path, yes that is our direction, and other doors are closed to us (for now). Was it the wrong choice? who knows? You don't know until you are on the path, you have to be willing to take the risk. And guess what, if it is the wrong choice....course correct. You will know the signs, they will keep popping up, whispering in your ears listen to them. You ALWAYS get another choice. It may not be easy but you do get other choices.
Exercise 3: Practice taking small risks. This is a good way to start to test this out, and realize the cost is not such a big deal. Start small, sign up for a class, go on that blind date, get all that long hair cut off! These may sounds silly but small risks can show you- hmmm, that wasn't so bad. Oh hindsight... and they can lead to taking on bigger risks- breaking things off with that person where you know deep down you are not happy, moving to a new part of the country, returning to school.
The universe has your back, really it does so give it a chance...if you have any doubts just go out in nature and notice the amazing way that everything just makes sense.